Broken, Mended & Made Whole

Two months after I got my driver’s license at 16 years old, I was at home one  rainy Monday  night  doing my  homework.  I  ran  out  of  paper  so  I jumped in my brand new red, Mustang convertible and headed for the store. When I got to the stop sign at the end of our street, I put on my brakes but the car slid in a 180 degree turn on the wet pavement. As I was sliding, a car going 50 miles per hour hit me head on!

Everything went black. I don’t remember anything except lights coming at me and then waking up later seated totally in the passenger’s side of my car. I thought I was dreaming. I got out of the car and  just stared at my car in the ditch trying to understand. I felt something pouring down my face and when I reached up to feel my head – it was gashed wide open! My head had actually cracked the front windshield.

Next thing I know, I’m sitting in an ambulance and the paramedic is wiping the blood off my face. I couldn’t help but think about him taking my make up off – and how I really wished he wouldn’t! That’s when they knew I was totally conscious!

He asked, “Are you hurting anywhere?”

I  said,  “Yes. It  hurts so bad!”  I pulled up my jogging pants on my  right leg to show him where the pain was excruciating and there it was: a tiny, little scratch across my knee! He simply wiped the blood off. Meanwhile, my head was gashed wide open with arteries hanging out….but all I could feel was the little scratch on my knee!

What I’ve realized is that when we’re hurt in life, we tend to focus on minor things when the real issue is left untouched.
To finish the story, I had to get stitches on the inside and outside of my head, and then they allowed my mom to take me home. I realized through this painful experience that as I began to recover, the healing process can be more painful than the initial injury. As the days went by, my stomach muscles became  so  sore  that  it became more and more difficult to get in and out of bed. The bruises on my face began to turn dark purple. And my right eye turned bloodshot after about three days.

When word got out about my wreck, all my friends wanted to come by and check on me. As each one visited, they all wanted  to  “see  the wound”  and  “talk  about  it”. And  each time I pulled the bandages back and exposed the wound, I delayed the healing process.

And  so  I’ve discovered how  this  accident parallels what we face when we encounter situations that hurt and wound us  in  life. Many times we experience something so painful at one point in our lives and it takes twenty years to recover! We often deal with  the effects of our wounds and not  the cause of  them. And  the  truth  is:  the healing process hurts .  .  .  and  it may  take  longer  than we  thought  to  totally be healed. As long as we keep talking about our pasts, exposing our wounds  to every new  set of ears, we are delaying our own recovery.

Satan works from the day you are born to bring hurts into your life. He sends messages your whole life that say you’re not valuable, you’re flawed, something  is wrong with you, you’re not good enough, you’re worthless! We’ve all been hurt at different times in our lives, some more severe than others. Some hurts are only on  the surface – not  too bad; others go deep and leave a permanent scar in our minds and affect us for years (maybe even a lifetime).

Is  there  something  from  your  past  that  wounded  you emotionally, an experience of rejection, betrayal, or abuse, and although you’ve blocked it out and moved on, you still feel that something isn’t totally right in you? I know I hid all of my pain behind one big band-aid. I just “covered it up”.  Band-aids don’t medicate or heal deep wounds,  they hide the wound and make everything look fine. I went through some  very painful  experiences of  rejection  and  I hid  every bit  of  it behind  a  giant  band-aid  of  activities,  a  big  smile,  and accomplishments — meanwhile I was bleeding on the inside.

When you’re bleeding inside – it’s eventually going to show up on the outside . . . in your behavior, your relationships,  your career, your  self-image, your overall choices. Since I felt so bad about myself inside – I had to do things on the outside to feel better (at the time, I didn’t know this was why I was doing it). You may be thinking, “I’m fine. What I went through was so long ago. I’m over it!” I thought I was too, until God began to show me little by little where I needed some major healing – deep down inside.

Things will never be right around you until they are first right in you. God will change your circumstances, but He’ll change you first. Just because we ignore something doesn’t make  it  go  away. What  happened  to  you  that  wounded your personality? Who hurt you? Who rejected you? Who belittled you? Who made you feel that you weren’t as good as someone else? Did you used to be fun or funny and now you  just go  through  the motions of  life? What memories are you still re-playing in your mind? Did you used to have dreams and goals on the inside?

With  all  that  aside, what  are  you  going  to  do with  the rest  of  your  life? Are  you  going  to  sit  back  and  allow  an experience(s) or  a person  stop  you  from doing what God put you on this Earth to do? You may be crying out, “God, what do you want me to do with my life?” And He’s saying, “Get healed.”

When  soldiers get wounded  in  the war,  they pull  them off the front lines and let them heal. They’re no good to us out there fighting all beat up. You may be trying to fight the devil with one eye shut, one arm in a sling and on crutches. You’re not gonna win! You’ve got  to get healed!  I know  I had to.

Isaiah 61:1 says, “He has sent me to heal the heartbroken . . . and comfort all who mourn.” Luke 4:18 says that Jesus came  “to set the  burdened  and  battered  free…”  In other words, Jesus came to set the captives free; Satan came to take the free captive! Satan wants to keep you trapped in something from  your  past  – what  you’ve  done  or what’s  been  done to you. Obviously, God knew Satan was out  to break our hearts and steal our dreams or he wouldn’t have sent Jesus to be the Healer of the Brokenhearted.

As I began seeking God for my own healing, I discovered that  in order to be healed, you first have to diagnose the problem. You  could be  taking  all  the wrong medicines  if you don’t know where you’re  sick. You  could be  thinking  that a new husband is going to fix the loneliness you feel in your current marriage. Or that a little cosmetic surgery will give you the confi dence you’ve  lacked your whole  life. Or that a promotion will heal your insecurities. Or that having a baby will bring  joy back  into  your  life. Nothing on  the outside is going to change the way you feel on the inside.

It  wasn’t  until  I  began  seeking  God  that  I  discovered my true problem. I used to think that I was just “shy” and that was my excuse for not going to certain events or being around certain people. Or I would think, “I’m just humble. I don’t have to be around the ‘big wigs’ to feel important.” It wasn’t humility, it wasn’t shyness, it was a fear of rejection! As God began to reveal this to me, I had to look back and see where this came from. And the Lord showed me specific times in my life where I was severely rejected and treated as having no value or 2nd best! I had to diagnose my problem! I  had  a major  fear  of  rejection. Once I diagnosed  the problem, I could treat it properly.

How do you discover  the problem? As with any illness, you have to seek out The Physician! In our case, that’s God! He is the Great Physician! This  is  something  only you can do for yourself! Have you ever been so sick that you don’t even want to get out of bed, but you know you need to go to the Doctor? You can’t send your friend, your spouse or your mom. They want to see YOU!

God wants to meet with you privately….just you and Him. You’re going  to need  to get comfortable being alone with God and having no “noise” on in the background. Shut the door,  turn  the cell phone off,  turn  the music off,  turn  the TV off, turn FaceBook off, and get alone with God. Talk to Him. Tell Him everything. Don’t hold anything back.

He wants to pour the medicine of His amazing love into your heart. It is THE CURE for every wound in your life! He loves you so much. He has always loved you. When you had that abortion, He still loved you. When you got in that wrong relationship, He still loved you. When you got out of church for a while, He still loved you. When you got mad and lost your temper, He still loved you. When you stopped talking with Him, He still loved you. When you were hurt, rejected, abused, He loved you.

How do you receive that healing when you’re alone with Him? Worshiping God for who you need Him to be brings healing. If your foot is hurting, you don’t go to the heart  specialist. You go to a Podiatrist.  If  your heart  isn’t beating right, you don’t go  to  the eye doctor. You go  to a cardiologist. Well, if your heart is broken and wounded inside, you don’t need to seek God (only) as your “fi nancial provider”. You seek God, Jehovah Rapha, the Healer of the Brokenhearted, as your healer.

There’s a story in Matthew 8 of a leper who is in need of healing. Verse 1 says, ‘Look! A leper is approaching, He kneels before him worshiping. ‘Sir,” the leper pleads, “if you want to, you can heal me.” Jesus touches the man. “I want to,” he says, “Be healed.” And instantly the leprosy disappears.

Notice 3 things:
#1. The leper wasn’t asking the Lord for a financial miracle. He sought the Lord as His Healer. He actually CRIED OUT to Him. God hears your cries every time you call out to Him. When you’re alone at night, He hears you. When you’re sitting at your desk fi ghting off depression, He hears you. When you’re driving to work in the morning holding back the tears, He hears you.
#2. He bowed down and worshiped BEFORE he got his healing. When we bow down and surrender all of our hurts to God while we’re still hurting, we are showing our faith in God to heal us. Bowing down is a true sign of total and complete dependency on God alone. It means you’re serious. It means you’re tired of being the way you are. It means you want to be healed!
#3. Jesus said, “I want to” — in other words, it is God’s will that you be healed from everything that hurts you. When you doubt God’s willingness, you’re really doubting His love for you. He wants to not only heal your heart and restore your soul, but He wants to make you whole.

What  does  being made whole mean? You can get to a place in your life where there are NO SIGNS you were ever sick before. NO SIGNS of emotional abuse! NO SIGNS of sexual abuse. NO SIGNS of physical abuse. NO SIGNS of  insecurities. NO SIGNS of depression! NO SIGNS of  rejection!

As you begin  to  look  for opportunities  to be alone with God, and lift your hands and begin praising Him for being who you need Him to be  (your Healer), He will send an earthquake from Heaven to brake the chains that have had you bound – possibly  for many years!  It  does  not matter how bound up you may be right now, start praising Jesus, the Healer of the brokenhearted, loudly right there in your bedroom,  in your bathroom,  in your kitchen,  in your car! I’m telling you from 1st hand experience –  the chains will come off! Satan has no power. He cannot stand in the midst of praise!

Don’t spend your  life  in  pain when  Jesus came  to  heal the brokenhearted, to deliver the oppressed and to set the burdened and battered free. You have a calling. You have a purpose. Don’t waste another day of your life hurting over something that happened to you back then. Cry. Let loose. Get free! God wants to use you to set others free! Let Him heal your heart, restore your soul and make you whole. The broken become masters at mending.

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